Hahahahahah! I feel like the joke is on me for trying to jumpstart my life right before the holidays. The good news is that I am motivated and I’m not going to stop till I get what I want in my life. Life can be messy and that’s a fact. Just take a look at my bathroom/future laundry room. I huge big unplanned mess. Even if you don’t want things to change life forces you to and it’s a good thing. Some people would never move otherwise. I have made a pledge to myself and I am moving forward.
Day 21: I paint and paint. My husband ( He seems to be the catalyst here doesn’t he?) Just finished work on our front entryway on Sunday and suggested I get it painted before the holidays. You know, because I don’t have anything else to do this week, but painting sure. After a huge rant to myself I decided that it would make him happy for me to complete the job. He does the work and then I paint. So, I dedicated Monday to painting. You’d be surprised at how calming painting is- very zen. I know my sister knows this for a fact. She is also the designated painter in her family.
After feeling all zen like my son dropped a huge emotional bomb on me. My poor guy, he is such a perfectionist and struggling with his own inadequacies. He’s almost 8, incredibly intelligent and has Aspergers and SPD. It took a lot for him to share with me. I wasn’t quite sure how to handle this, but what I did worked well. He told me at dinner that he was afraid to tell me, but from now on he’ll tell me everything.
Then I stayed up till midnight wrapping gifts.
So, for today’s project me I learned that I am a good mom and that feels awesome!
Day 22: I’m starting to feel the bloat and I’m not sleeping as well. All my work has gone out the window sort of. I know now that I can do it and plan on following through, but today it’s not going to happen. My little one has his class party today and I need to bring food and help out with the party and craft. I also called a CSE meeting for my big guy and have to work on my material for that as well. Oh, then we have piano. I want to cancel piano soooooo baddddd. I just can’t. This is about Noah, not me, and he needs to go.
Surprisingly, the party actually made me feel good. These little ones can be so sweet. I might have taken on too much, but I couldn’t not do it. I love getting to know these kids and watching them grow. I’m feeling blessed that I get to do that in my life. It makes me a better person.
Tomorrow is my meeting. I need to be strong. I need a plan. I need to make it through the holidays.